Wednesday, November 18, 2009

The New Golden Heart Rules--for Writing

I am in GH revisions and I have less than a week to get this puppy out the door. There is an official submission guideline for the contest, but I have my rules for submitting that have very little to do with formatting. Here they are:

*Stouffer's products are healthy ... they are your friend
*yes, dear, you may have a colleague over for dinner provided he/she understands that Stouffer's is the chef de jour
*yes, dear, you may have a colleague over provided he/she understands that dust bunnies only reside here during GH prep month (haha)
*baths? what are those?
*hair? makeup? Oh. My. God! I really am... pushing... won't even utter the age number
*paper and ink... keep a steady supply and don't share with anyone
*lint... learn to love it
*dust... take allergy meds
*toilet bowl cleaner can stay in the toilet for days
*synonyms? we don't need no stinkin' synonyms...
*it really is okay to have clutter for now
*living on leftovers ... from Stouffer's.... it's okay
*wine... chocolate... tea.... Dr. Pepper... all allowed in great quantities
*I have a family? Oh yeah...
*clean clothes? oh yeah... did the timer beep on the dryer? Why get up and check?
*suddenly plucking chin hairs becomes an obsession and beautiful diversion from the keyboard
*who knew there were so many ways to say "buried?"
*love me now, scold me later.... (title for a new book I am sure!)

And that is it in a nutshell.... go forth, be bold, bathe occasionally, and stock up on frozen dinners.


Gwen Hernandez said...

I love this! With all the hoopla going on right now, I'm glad to see your sense of humor still intact.

Christine said...

I am nothing without my brass... and sass.... onward ho! Got to wrap my brain around the synopsis for TFC. AAAACK... crazy day today. Had to bathe and must put on makeup because I am going out in public with my DD and my DH invited a colleague over for din din (hope he likes Stouffers LOL and dust bunnies for entertainment)