Thursday, July 23, 2009

RWA Conference Virgin--No More! Oh the Glory!

Well it's been ages since I posted! But here I am, full of ... ok ... truth is I am pooped. It was so wonderful, but so exhausting. I talked till I lost my voice, I pitched and it worked out very well (no illusions: my DD calls me a pessimist, but I call myself a realist). It's hard to be "on" all the time. And it's hard to figure out who is who... and it's hard to have a success and then reflect upon the folks in one's life who aren't there to celebrate it.

And as an unpublished writer, every small success is celebrated over at my house.

I learned a lot about myself. Yes, I am not shy, but I am a bit reserved. I can tell a funny story (about myself--easier that way) and people laugh at my stories. But to hobnob in a group of many, many people who I don't know and some of them might be "uber important?" No way. It's daunting. Plus, I don't like NOISE and crowds that are too large. It's like going to a vampire ball for me. Sucks me dry.

So. I didn't make it to the RITA/GOLDEN HEART Reception for chocolate and wine. Too many people and too overwhelming, but I loved watching everyone kibbitz and I enjoyed all the winners' speeches and I loved dressing up pretty for a change.

I learned I like one-on-one chats or small groups. I learned I can shut up--don't laugh those who know me and who are reading this! All those years of DISCIPLE Class have paid off! I just look down.

Oh, I learned to smile and wave... a lot. Ask the penguins.

I learned that I am a floater, not good at introducing people I don't know to people I hardly know, but exceedingly good at introducing people I just met to people I just met... it's a weird thing. I felt too new -- I guess I hung back a bit, but I had a great time. And I learned I can do this again.

Plus I got my requests: woot!!!!!!!!! It's a temporary high.

And now it's back to reality: writing and polishing. Back to wondering if it is worthy to send. If I am a crap writer and am always going to get close but no cigar... But no matter. It is here. A start. I plan. I plot. I have more stories beating the brain cells and begging me to hurry up and get this book out the door. I have a fourth ready for revision. I have a fifth in embryonic stages, and I have a series I am playing with for YA.

Even if I am never published, I have learned that romance writers rock and I am blessed to be a part of this huge, creative group of people. From top to me, they care. We are all on the same journey.

It is crazy. A journey filled with sorrow, bizarre fits of happiness, an occasional jaunt to buy much chocolate, and one's companions totally get one's complete obsession with Hugh Jackman, cutting out pictures of amazing gorgeous men, spinning tales and living in one's head. They get the hope, the fear, the doubt, the shoes, did I mention the chocolate and the wine, and the glory of jumping each hurdle and reaching each goal.

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