If I'm Not Writing, I'm...

-at the local YMCA where I meet my Zumba sisters, hang out with the Pilates crowd, and try not drop a weight on my toe in the Body Sculpt class.

-cuddling the Fur Babies--Tonks and Mischief need lots of attention.

-shopping for groceries, cooking meals, preparing high energy and low calorie snacks.

-entertain the Physicist's colleagues.

-attend and/or host a monthly book club.

-cleaning the house--it's a big house and I'm the current Commander in Chief of House.

-talking on the phone with my friends in other countries and states.

-traveling with the Physicist to see our friends or just have a romantic getaway.

-managing the household budget and bills--another struggle.

-texting the College Kid and sending her pictures of cool stuff.

-taking care of the College Kid, going to doctor appointments with her, trying to help her find the balance she needs to live a long and full life that's filled with happiness.

-wrangling medical information, insurance information, the CK's long distance medical issues.

-running a contest for my writing chapter.

-helping my Goal in a Month group as a scheduler.

-decorating the house with fun little bits of whimsy.

-looking for interesting recipes to try out on the family.

-planning my getaways.

-yard work--the struggle is real.

-hiding in my tornado shelter with the fur babies.

-reading a great book.

-fritzing around on Pinterest, Facebook, Tumblr, Twitterville.

-meeting a friend for lunch.

-encouraging others and listening to them.

-critiquing and beta reading books.

-running a gazillion errands.

-watching reruns of Everybody Loves Raymond.

-watching movies with the family.

-going to friends' houses for dinners and drinks.

-just being.

What do you do when you're not where you're supposed to be?

Champagne Promise

The Physicist and I have been married for 27 years. We're practically a Ripley's exhibit in that we have stuck together through thick and thin. We do take the vows we made all those years ago seriously. But it's amazing we're still together when you consider how many personality factors there are against us and lead us into conflict. And when we spar it is with great intensity.

Take a look at what we brought into our marriage when we first said our "I do's."

Our Similarities

*We're each first born children with one younger sibling.

*We're both earth signs. He is a Taurus, and I am a Capricorn.

*We're both fiercely independent.

*We're both from very dysfunctional families.

*We're both very driven.

*We hate to lose.

*We're stubborn.

Our Differences

*He's analytical and I'm intuitive.

*He's a scientist and I'm a romance writer.

*He's a thinker and I'm an instinctive reactor.

*He's an immovable boulder and I'm a spontaneous combustion.

You can see where this is going... We lock horns a lot. We have major arguments a lot. And we argue loud. Heck we have had arguments about our arguments and about what actually qualifies as a argument. I remember his dad telling me that no one ever could best the Physicist in argument and I said, "That was until he met me."

The Physicist wanted a woman who would challenge him, and he got one. I wanted a man who wasn't a pushover, and I got one.

And that's okay because we genuinely love and respect each other. He's my best friend. He makes me happy, and we have fun together. We're perfect for each other. But we do argue a lot.

This brings me to our Champagne Promise. The Physicist bought an expensive bottle of champagne after a very big fight. He said that we could open it if we went without a major argument for at least seven days. That was three years ago. The running joke in our house was that we probably would have to wait until one of us dies before we could pop that champagne bottle's cork.

A little over a week ago we decided we would make the effort to open that bottle of champagne. It's expensive, but it's not that expensive. It could go bad. We wouldn't want to drink that champagne in our 90s or worse have to wait until one of us um, died. 

It's New Year's Day and I'm happy to report that today we will open the champagne!!!

I think we came close to losing the privilege a few times, but I'd look at the Physicist and say, "You do want to open that champagne, don't you?" And he would nod and bite back his argument.

Hmmmm, maybe I should buy another bottle of expensive champagne tomorrow and use it as leverage. Maybe we should try to last TWO weeks without a major argument... but then the making up is all so sweet ;-)  

A Day in the Life of a Female Writer--THE RIVER WITCH WINNER ANNOUNCED

I recently read a great book about writing called THE ART OF WAR FOR WRITERS by James Scott Bell. I could incorporate everything he'd written about and apply it to my life except for 1 section. The section talked about being a prolific and fast writer. He's right. The more we write, the better we become as writers and as revisers. And the list of prolific writers and their example of how much they wrote was very impressive. I was blown away by all that they had done. One writer even went to a library and used a dime driven typewriter in the library's basement where he banged out a novel in 6 weeks. Impressive. Very impressive.

Now look at the pronoun: HE.

And guess why HE went to the library? Because he'd just become a father of a new baby (not sure how many HE had with his wife) and the baby's crying *um* disturbed his writing time and concentration. Oh, how I can relate. But then, in a similar position, guess what I'd be doing? Yup. I'd be at home with the baby and taking care of it between looking after the house and the groceries and the laundry and maybe the job and oh, trying to squeeze in writing time.

I know one writer friend who is a mom, has a full time job, and currently just signed a three book deal. She gets up at 4AM every morning and writes until it's time to go to work. But I bet she also takes care of a lot of other things, too. I bet her hubby helps. But then, I'll have to ask how she does it all and does it well. And I wonder HOW MUCH MORE PROLIFIC WOULD SHE BE if she could go to the library and write all day?

Hmmm... Truth is women are master jugglers. Often times, the busier we are, the more we accomplish. Less to do equals less accomplished in many cases. But I have to go on to say that in all the examples given by James Scott Bell, NONE OF THEM WERE WOMEN. Which then brings me to a mini rant about how much more beautiful the world would have been had women been given the time and opportunity and education eons ago during the pre-liberation ages. How many artists and writers and dreamers and innovators did we lose because the potential to become those wonderful things was wrapped in a female's skin?

I know. I am being a bit "political." But I just finished a power and haunting book that shows me how great a gift it is to live in a society that gives women the opportunity to become who they need to become. Trust me. Not all societies in these days offer women that freedom. And that's a post for another day.

I'm one of the lucky female writers because I don't have a DREADED DAY JOB or what's referred to in the Romance world as the DDJ. I have been raising the chick since she came home and filled my hours with volunteer work at church, school, HOA duties, and various other roles. I wasn't eating bon bons or watching TV all day (I admit a fondness for ALL MY CHILDREN and ONE LIFE TO LIVE back in the day--probably where all my ideas come from LOL).

But the truth is, I have a lot to take care of in addition to the writing. The Physicist travels a lot, sometimes for many weeks. So I'm often dealing with the Teen alone. Not so bad these days, but it is still my responsibility to make sure she's fed, watered, healthy, etc. Along with all those duties, I do the bulk of the household duties because I am not bringing in an income. I feel I must justify my existence and I use what is called "maid money" to support my writing habit.

So there's laundry, cleaning, dusting, grocery shopping, clutter clearing, overall maintenance of the day-to-day living that take up my time. I don't have the luxury of going to some library and typing on my laptop all day. That's the truth of it. And since I'm not a night owl, I must write during the day and figure out how to squeeze all the other duties in without losing site of my writing goals.

I have a schedule. I can ignore dust, but not for long. So I often clean house while I'm waiting for my pages to get back to me. And nowadays there's this pressure to be a presence in the social media world, but I ignore that pressure because I agree with James Scott Bell: THE BOOK TRUMPS EVERYTHING.

I'd like to be more prolific, but LIFE trumps the books. And at the end of this writer's life, I hope to have quilt of happiness enveloping me. A quilt that love, friendship, motherhood, companionship, and writing created.

And speaking of happiness, here's the winner of THE RIVER WITCH: Robin!! Yay!! Congratulations and I'll get your information to KIMBERLY BROCK.

BICHOK & Body Moving--I'm Just Not that Interesting

I've been in contest prep land for over a month. I entered two different contests with four different manuscripts in each contest. I am not sure if I'll final, but I always like to enter contests because they give me deadlines. And if I do final, I have a positive affirmation about my writing. If I final in the Golden Heart then I have a fun networking time to look forward to, but I'm not going to count on the Golden Heart. I am putting together kick a$$ partials and querying them long before those results are in. I want a contract. I want to draw attention to my name and prove to my favorite publishing house that while I am waiting to hear from them about my revise and resubmit, I have been busy writing new books for them.

So once the Golden Heart entries are out, I am putting together submission packages and query packages. I have lots and lots to do. This is my life. I know I'm supposed to be interesting in this blog and write about stuff that will draw in readers for my future publications, but the truth is my life is not so interesting right now. I'm BICHOK all the time and even my new kitten thinks I'm boring. She'll get used to it. I do take breaks and play with her.

But a writer can't be BICHOK all the time. BICHOK stands for BUTT IN CHAIR HANDS ON KEYS. This is usually the case. I'm a motivated and dedicated writer. I put in 3-4 hours or more per day  to this career that is currently rewarding me with my own quarters. For every hour I write, I get a quarter. I also get a quarter for every deadline met and for every contest entry sent out. I am busy busy busy. Made over $30 last week!! Woot.

But if I'm not BICHOK I am taking care of myself. I made a decision to take care of my body and lose weight despite the fact that my thyroid is acting up all the time. (I have lost the same poundage 3 times now and I had hormonal help gaining it--not fun but that's the way my cookie crumbles). I tried the 4 Hour Body diet. Fail. Epic fail. I had thyroid checked. It was wonko so went on better medication and tried another diet. Weight Watchers. Doing well on it. I have stopped counting points every day, but I have slowly lost 14 pounds since mid-July. I wish I could lose it without trying but that's not possible. In addition to dieting I have been going to the gym. A lot. I have worked out hard. I attend Zumba classes, I do a weight workout, and I do cardio machines. I also go for long walks. I even worked out with my friend when I went to DC. I ate what I wanted to eat, but I didn't gain any significant weight. What I did gain was lost as soon as I got home.

Right now I've hit another plateau, but I am determined to drop at least another 10 pounds. Wish me luck. It's Thanksgiving and cold weather season. A season where I'd rather eat and stay home and warm and cosy by my computer but I will prevail. I'm just like a lot of women who run households and empires. This is my life. Writing, working out, dieting, worrying, cooking, being a mom, being a kitty mom, being a wife.

I'm not that interesting. I just have a dream and a goal and hope that one day I will be published. Ask my kitten, Catadora Tonks. I'm just that lady who sits all day except when she takes a break to play with her kitty or go to the gym or buy groceries or cook a meal.

I'm an ordinary woman with a normal everyday life and my concerns are the same as other women in my age group. I have to diet and exercise. I have to go to the doctor and get all kinds of stupid tests that are not fun or pleasant because of my age, I have a graduating teen and she's great, but a lot of pressure is cooking. I'm an unpublished writer who wants to be published and believes one day it will happen about as often as she believes it won't happen. There are no guarantees.

I just write. That's what I love to do. I hope one day my books will be published and that they will interest my readers. In the meantime, I hope to stay relatively healthy and normal sized so I don't look weird at the book signings.

What's your life like?

Catadora Tonks and Her Purrfect Day

Cat in a Box 

Well, I wasn't going to get another fur baby, but famous last words. As many of my followers know, along with my friends, after two months of mourning the DFC,  I caved to the lure of a sweet baby who was bound for the pound. I couldn't say no to this kitten. And honestly? I am so glad I said yes. Catadora Tonks has brought life and laughter and love into our home.


She is a light, creamy orange kitten with no white. She is completely buff and and has perfect markings. She is tiny. Super tiny. The vet said she has a baby personality. She is "sweet & adorable all the time." That pretty much sums up Tonks. She is MY baby, but she plays with and purrs with and cuddles with anyone who wants to hold her and be with her.

She is beyond cute. And beyond funny. Here are some highlights of Catadora Tonks during her perfect day:

Tonks with her favorite toy.

*cat mommy wakes up. Tonks is ready to play. Tonks bounces all over the bed, like Tigger, bop bop bop from mound to moving hand under the blankets. Oh, what a fun and amazing toy is this bed with humans in it.

*time to eat. bop bop bop to the kitty litter and food bowls in the humans' master bedroom bathroom. Oh joy!!

*bounce to the kitchen, investigate the spigots, get some water sprayed on her fur to get off counter, bounce to another place, play with orange mouse-like toy

*cat mommy is boring. She is in front of the computer in her office, typing. Tonks must investigate. She chews the corner of the laptop, bounces to the cords. Shoot more water to dissuade. She plays under special cat toy, she bounces to the printer area and hides in the paper. Chews more cords. Gets squirted. She jumps on chair and sleeps.

*Whew, what a tough morning. Time to watch cat mommy exercise. Oh, nibbling her nose and chin and hair while cat mommy tries to do push ups is fun. Oh, reverse squats mean legs to chase. More FUN!

*eat, watch cat mommy take a shower, lick cat mommy's feet when she steps out of the shower (just in case she missed a spot), then try to jump on the bathroom counter to check out what cat mommy is doing while she gets ready for her day. Mommy helps. Check spigot. Lick the sink. Yuck. Jump into cat bed, groom self and watch cat mommy blow dry her hair and put on makeup. We are getting ready together.

*sleep

*chase Mischief and ask her to play. Get hissed at. Run and hide. Try again.

*cat mommy boring again. More computer stuff. Lay on mommy's lap. Sleep and purr (really loud). Snuggle. Bring toy to play with during mommy's break. Ask for water. Ask for food. Sleep again.

*everyone's home. Chase Mischief again. Get hissed at. Run away. Do it all again. Act naughty. Get sprayed. Go lay with Cat Daddy on his recliner. Take a nap with him.

*chase Mischief, eat, play around, be silly. Meowyawn. Time for bed. Lay next to cat mommy. Sleep till  hungry. Start purring really loud. Nibble on mommy's nose. Mommy carries Tonks to the food and water. Eat. Drink. Go back to bed. Sleep. Nibble mommy's nose two more times. Mommy puts hands in front of her face. Alarm! Time to get up!! Time to get playing all over again.

Wouldn't you think you hit the jackpot if you were Tonks?