Tip Toe into the New Writing Structure

I am scrapping a quest to crank out 3 category books a year to focus on redefining the current WIP as I learn how to create a Single Title length book. Wow. I'm looking at the entire MS in a new light, and if it weren't for my CPs giving me their support, I think my head would pop off with all the changes I must implement as I *grow my book* and learn.

After meeting with one of my CPs in Birmingham, we agreed to give ourselves until the end of February to send each other our drafts for critique. She's working on a super cool book and I can't wait to read it. The few paragraphs I read already hooked me. Ooh, she's got more than one RS *romantic suspense* in her writing brain. I know it.

As for me? I'm not sure. I think I've more than one RS in me, but I'm leaning toward lighter, ST contemporary romances with suspenseful elements. I'll know more about where I'm heading after I finish this book. What will I miss writing? What will I love writing? What will I reveal about my own writing voice to myself? Oh, it's exciting!

Meanwhile, the task awaits. I'm committed to making the change. I'm committed to working hard. But this is new, and I'm tip toeing shyly into this writing sea. First, I started a new draft in WORD and renamed it TFC SINGLE TITLE 1 (third time through the plot--and I'm sure not the last time I'll rework it). Then I created a file in my trusty Scrivener program.

Back to basics. Import the doc. Thanks to my Southern CP, I learned short cut to making new scenes in the binder (whew). Then I made color coded the scene cards with MC's initials on them. I accidentally discovered a way to add notes to the doc and retrieve them in the scenes (this is how I learn a lot of new things when it comes to technology). I think this tool will be very helpful as I revise the MS.

I know this doesn't seem like a lot of writing, but it was good to see it all laid out. I know where there are gaps already. Now my Northern CP's critique will come into play as I forge ahead. I have a lot of decisions to make as I rewrite. Some of them will lead to major cutting. I loathe the idea, but I know I have to do it in order to make space for the new words.

I'll be honest. Reading this draft in bits and pieces, the part that's still more rough than polished, I wonder what the heck? But I refuse to wallow in the "I suck as a writer" mud. I refuse. I am learning. I am growing and I am taking on a challenge.

I am excited!

BIF, GMC, ABC & 1,2,3

My brain is full. And for the first time since I forced my butt in a chair to write 4.5 years ago, I have no idea where to go next with this story.

Last night, for the first time, I told my husband I wasn't sure I could pull this story off. Every time I fix X, I find another problem with A, B, C and the list goes on and on. If I change her GMC, I lose his story. If I change his GMC, I lose her story.

It's a nightmare.

My original concept was so fun and light. Now I keep finding great conflicts, but I lose the fun part. I honestly don't see a way out. DH said I needed to look at it abstractly or just write and not worry about it at all. Oddly, I believe the GMC is there. I did like that he had a history where he knew who she was, but she didn't know him at all. Now if I have her know who he is at the beginning, that takes away an element of surprise, too.

It's like knitting with four balls of yarn and hitting a snag, untangling it, and finding a totally different color at the end of the line.

So I sit here, inert. Brain dead. Wondering. Worrying. In a well of doubt.

Do I scuttle it and lose $50? Write what I originally planned and the heck with the issues facing it?  Tweak it and hope for the best in regard to the GH? Or do I rework it completely and slap the title on the entry even though it no longer suits the story for the GH? AAAAACCCCKKKKK!!!!!!!!

Yesterday I read BREAK INTO FICTION. The entire thing. Front to back. Great for the next book, and it'll help with this book, but I'm not sure how much I can save. It's like throwing a lifeline to a boat with holes and too many people inside. Someone is going to drown no matter what I do.

I brainstormed. I plotted. I bought sharpie pens. I got poster board. I made gobs of notes.

But now, today, in this moment. I got nothing. Nada. It's not a writer's block. I can write. I just don't know if what I choose to write will be the right write.

Yesterday, I reread my reasons for writing the story and the original hero/heroine cards I started with and I feel the answer is lurking in them. But where? I have my fishing line out, a hook in the water, and a minnow on the end. But no nibbles are answering my line.

So today? What to do?

I'll play around with it all a bit more. I'll fill out note cards, make my GMC charts, review my brainstorming notes, go through the BIF templates a CP sent me (thanks G!), and pray for serious AHA solution moment to show up between now and Monday.

And I'll query another agent with the third MS just feel some sense of accomplishment.